How do you connect with people? Below are 7 steps to help navigate the waters and get you on track to create some lasting new friendships and possible future business partners!
1. Decide to be outgoing. Just decide and take action on that. Say hi to strangers. You do not have to have a full conversation. Strangers talk to me ALL of the time, so that gives me practice! Be outgoing, but also be approachable.
2. Find common ground and a common interest. Conversations are more natural when you find a shared topic of interest. This probably will involve asking some questions to dive a bit deeper to find that interest. But it will be worth it.
3. Reveal something about yourself – be vulnerable. Put your “story” into words and use that as a sharing point. That personal element is what will sell. Otherwise, you’re just another person in sales. Weaving your story into the conversation adds another dimension.
4. Create a relationship before you try to sell! Build rapport by getting to know them personally. Then they will be perceptive to buying something from you if you offer a solution to a problem they have. Create a friendship and trust. If someone then buys from you, great. Otherwise, you will have found a friend! Win-win!
5. Actually listen! Find out their needs and wants (and this pertains to your significant other, also!!) – listen to what they are saying and their body language. Then provide a solution to their problem. Listen to problem. Offer solutions.
6. Stay in touch – auto-reminders for birthdays/anniversaries, etc. Everyone loves to be remembered!! You can communicate with them via phone/email/social media, but sometimes it’s nice to be face-to-face.
7. Be patient. Rome wasn’t built in a day. Do you think you are going to make your goals overnight? If you have been placing the foundation of your dream, are two weeks in and haven’t seen anything coming out of your efforts? This will not happen overnight. Be patient.
7 Ways to Connect with People
Just remember – selling is like courting someone. You have to woo them – and sometimes, they will not return the love. That’s ok – you will find the chemistry with someone else. You are looking for specific people, not everyone!
I love the song “Heathens” by Twenty-One Pilots. Tyler, the lead singer, sings that his friends are Heathens. He also associates with that title. Don’t get hung up on that word –it's just referring to an “outside” group of people.
Song is about about newcomers into the group – and the “Heathens” don’t always deal well with that.
Sometimes hard to mix the two. And people don’t always respond well to change.
It can take time to get accustomed to new people. You never know the "psychopath or murderer sitting next to you."
People often hide their true identity.
The only win them over is by patiently getting to know them. The song addresses trust issues, "smell your intentions."
“Don’t make any sudden moves.”
These are a little extreme, but basically saying slowly get to know us. Don’t try to shove your agenda down their throats.
Follow the steps above and you will be right on track in creating a new relationship with the foundation laid to last for a very, very long time. I love the ending scene from Casablanca: