You Become What You Think

Welcome back!

An old Grandfather said to his grandson, who came to him with anger at a friend who had done him an injustice…   “Let me tell you a story.”

“I too, at times, have felt great hate for those who have taken so much, with no sorrow for what they do. But hate wears you down, and does not hurt your enemy. It’s like taking poison and wishing your enemy would die. I have struggled with these feelings many times. “

“It is as if there are two wolves inside me; one is good and does no harm. He lives in harmony with all around him and does not take offense when no offense was intended. He will only fight when it is right to do so, and in the right way.”

“But…the other wolf… ah! The littlest thing will send him into a fit of temper. He fights everyone, all of the time, for no reason. He cannot think because his anger and hate are so great. It is helpless anger, for his anger will change nothing.”

“Sometimes it is hard to live with these two wolves inside me, for both of them try to dominate my spirit.”

The boy looked intently into his Grandfather’s eyes and asked, “Which one wins, Grandfather ?”

The Grandfather smiled and quietly said, 

"The one I feed."

 -Native American Tale

Negativity is a superpower.

Unfortunately, it is a fact that negativity has a stronger impact than positivity.

Clifford  Nass, a professor of communication at Stanford University, co-authored “The Man Who Lied to His Laptop: What Machines Teach Us About Human Relationships” (Penguin 2010). Negative emotions generally involve more thinking, and the information is processed more thoroughly than positive ones, he said.

“There are physiological as well as psychological reasons for this.”

We tend to remember negative experiences very strongly and in great detail; we must overcome the effect from bad events with a ratio of five good events to every one bad event. 

(Information modified from Praise Is Fleeting, but Brickbats We Recall published in the NY Times.)

five good events are needed to offset one bad event

How to begin your day:

Don’t immediately plug in.  It’s difficult to do this, we check in right before sleeping and the minute we wake up.  Let your mind and body first wake up and just be. 

Skip the news.  If the early morning news begins to make your blood boil, that is a toxic way to begin your day.  Leave it off.  Maybe read a bit before you begin your day to begin to fill your mind with meaningful and positive information.

Decide you will have a positive day.  Make a conscious decision and focus on each positive you encounter in your day.  Believe it.  Decide. 

From an earlier post on Motivation:

“Sustain a positive attitude.  If you are not a positive person by nature, you can make changes in your attitude to create it.  Read uplifting literature/posts/books.  Position yourself to be around positive people.  If someone comes to you, ready to gossip about the juicy rumor of the day, stop them in their tracks.  A successful person is focused on how to improve themselves, not tear down someone else.  Always be loyal to the absent.” 

“Implement positive self-talk.  Even if you do not know how to begin, first start reading and listening to media that gives you positive words to use in your life.  This will begin to be your vocabulary and your confidence will grow.  If you begin to stray from this, create a mantra that can bring your focus back around.  If you cannot be positive to yourself, you absolutely cannot exude positive leadership to others.”

As we practice being positive, the response becomes more automatic.  Our brains must go through training to create a lasting, more positive response.  Reflect on good things daily, do thoughtful things for people, show gratitude daily.  Your mind will produce what it is fed. 

Your mind will produce what it is fed.

Nourish your mind with good.

You become what you think.


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Hi, my name is Chondra Rankin!  My passion is teaching and inspiring YOU how to become prepared to grasp the luxury of designing your life well - so you can live your life... your way!

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